Brushes with Celebrities

 

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I’m a big fan of Beachbody.  I can’t really hide that.  And of course I wouldn’t want to!  I’m super lucky that I’ve had the chance to meet some Beachbody leaders, Super Trainers, and supplement creators in the last year.

I went to a Super Saturday event in Orange County the beginning of 2016 and got to hear the CEO Carl Daikler speak. He’s amazing. He’s so good at getting everyone excited about life.  I’ve seen him speak in person before, but this time I got to have a photo op with him. Super cool.

Flash forward to Summit 2016. My friend and teammate Angel and I got to get a quick photo with Tony Horton, OG Beachbody Super Trainer, in the hotel room before Summit really kicked off.  Look at that SMIZE!  We were super lucky and he was very nice to accommodate us and use his long arm to take the photo.

I chatted up Dr. Nima Alamdari, the Director of Scientific Affairs at Beachbody when I saw him in the halls.  I had also met him the previous year when the Beachbody Performance line was launched.  I got to talk science stuff with him.  And he let me take a photo.

Randomly, on the street, I got to meet Superfood Hunter Darin Olien, one of the co-creators of Shakeology. I’m a big fan of his philosophy of food, and I love his book Superlife.  I got a photo with him as well and told him that I was having trouble getting my husband to drink his Shakeology daily.  Darin suggested I tie him up and force feed him.  He’s really great!

I won an Instagram contest in October and in December, I got an in-home visit from Autumn Calabrese, the Super Trainer who has brought my favorite programs to life, and her brother Bobby Calabrese.  Together their cooking show Fixate and the Fixate cookbook has helped change how we eat and approach food.  They were honestly just as lovely and wonderful as I could have hoped.  We cooked with them, shopped with them and had some great talks about fitness, food, living in California, and everything else.

My last brush with a Beachbody celebrity was Mr. Tony Horton again.  He spoke at our local Super Saturday and I got a photo op!  Sadly, I couldn’t do his workout because I had an injured shoulder.  But he gave a great Q&A and really brought a lot of things into perspective that I was missing.  Our photo time was brief, but he called me Sweetheart, and can you really ask for anything else?

One of my wildest dreams is to be Beachbody famous myself.  I want to be a top coach, have an incredible result to share, and keep inspiring  other people to go for it.  I want to talk on the National Wake Up Call, and in front of the crowd at a Super Saturday. Until I’m legit famous, I’ll have out with the elite when I can.

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No One Gets to Make You Feel Bad.

I did some personal development courses over the last couple of years and it did make me feel more bulletproof.  My biggest take-away from that aspect was that no one can hurt your feelings.  Feelings aren’t something that is injured.  You can choose to not allow anything to make you feel bad.

I still struggle with feeling bad.  I haven’t reached bulletproof status yet.

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One thing that I am really guilty of doing is hiding things that really upset me. That doesn’t really do any good but I find myself embarrassed by what happened and what my response was.

Earlier this month, I went on an outing by myself.  I was walking around a small downtown area enjoying the day, enjoying my own company, and enjoying my thoughts.  Even extroverts get some good stuff from a self-date.

I was minding my own business, walking, watching, thinking, when men in a car that passed me by decided to yell out their window at me.  How do I know it was me?  The street was deserted.  Their chant was negative and it regarded my weight, my appearance and how  I was porcine-like.

I responded by doing nothing. Oh, I heard it.  I’m sure my cheeks got red because I don’t have great control over my autonomic nervous system after all.  I just walked with the same peaceful look on my face and categorized the encounter as one of those ones I wish I could forget. I texted a friend as soon as I ducked in to a shop.  I just told my husband tonight.

This isn’t the first time a stranger or even an acquaintance decided to make a statement about me, at me, to get my attention in a malicious way.  The first time I can remember was 5th grade.  There were times in high school, college, being at the mall, and last year when I did a lot of street running when training for my half marathon. These were never “woo hoo, you go girl” genuine cheers.  These were always meant to be taken negatively and designed to make me feel bad about existing in this world and looking the way I do.

Street harassment isn’t a new thing and it certainly isn’t something that has stopped being discussed. In our culture, we are opening our eyes to how men and women experience different treatment. One viral video shows a woman confronting her harassers in sometimes very funny ways. When we think of street harassing women, we usually think of cat calls. Even for people like me, who try to be enlightened, can think of it as a very misplaced way to compliment someone in a knee jerk reaction, when it happens to someone else.

The truth is, there isn’t a lot of difference between someone cat calling someone on the street and yelling something derogatory at them. They are both unwanted. Neither one come from a well intentioned place. Both are only slung to elicit a response. Both make the issuer feel power over the target. And since we live in the United States, both are completely protected by the first amendment of our Constitution.

But just because speech is protected, doesn’t mean you can’t be viewed as a first class jerk for having said it.

I honestly don’t know if I can do anything about this. How could I have changed the outcome of that occurrence?  If I was a Marvel Superhero I could have stopped the car, jumped on the hood, and made a speech and made them poo their drawers.  But this is real life, I’m not a superhero. I was a pedestrian, they were in a car, and I could have been liable to any damage jumping on the car would have done. (I love how working in insurance has since colored so many of my revenge fantasies with reality.)

My mom always told me to ignore teasing. This isn’t really teasing. This is taking ownership of my body away from me. This is gross. And though it’s perfectly legal, it’s not okay.

The only thing I can think to do is not be silent.  So I’m writing this piece and I’ll see how I feel afterwards.

My Average is Awesome

Once in awhile I get stuck in “The Wallows.” I usually come out of it just fine, but whether it is hormones, the phase of the moon, the length of the days, I can count on it making a brief cameo or an extended contract appearance in the normal sunshine and rainbows I try to cultivate.

(And instead of banishing The Wallows, I’ve decided to let it happen, confront it and learn from it.)

The latest installment on The Wallows has been a pretty typical one for me. My friends. My relationships. And usually the song is “No One Likes You Anymore.”

I’ve seen through this one a little bit.

Three years ago I started learning more about how to be a effective Beachbody Coach. The training includes a ton of personal development exercises and honestly, really just kicks off a lot of development that never actually ends. But, trust me, it’s a good thing. One of the exercises was to identify the Top 5 people you spend time with in your life. Why? Because you are the average of the Top 5 people you spend your time with. The Top 5 people you give energy and attention to. We were challenged to consider if those Top 5 people were good, positive influences that would support you in your life, and if they would help you become a success. I easily identified my Top 5. My Top 5 people were people that I freaking loved, and they loved me. And I knew that it would never change.

It did change. Of course it changed. That’s what happens. My Top 5 in 2014 are not my Top 5 in 2017. Three years of stuff and change and experiences have happened for me and for each of them. The problem was part of my brain was holding on to the dearly departed members of my Top 5 squad. I have a massive fear of loss. And I attributed the perceived loss to being my fault.

Members of my former Top 5 were people who are great friends, but did not share my enthusiasm for my Beachbody business. In fact, I think my ridiculous enthusiasm was very off putting to them. Which made me feel like crap because, why weren’t they supporting me as blindly as I expected them to? They just weren’t. And what I see now is, that’s totally okay. No one is required to buy into your dreams. And if you can’t convince them, it doesn’t mean you didn’t do a good job and it doesn’t mean your dreams don’t matter.

I made a few really lame attempts to talk to a few of my friends about my big dreams and my love for what I was doing, but honestly, I was scared to hear anything negative and my idea of a big heart to heart basically was a couple of mumbled sentences and change of subject.

Honestly, I don’t know what I expected from them. Maybe I wanted them to listen to me, enraptured and join my team of coaches and go full on Beachbody blue. My dreams aren’t everyone else’s. My interests aren’t universal. And I’m starting to be OK with that. Really I am.

These friends were easy targets for The Wallows. I’ll give you a taste of the kind of things my unfriendly voices would say. “They don’t believe in you.” “No one believes in you.” “You are a joke.” “You’ll never be a success.” “This is a scam.” “Your business cost you your friends.” “They think you are dumb.”

I’m a fierce friend. I’m the kind of person who is almost a Stage 4 clinger. I love you hard. I love you without reserve. But not everyone is like me. And sadly, people I loved stopped showing up for me.

I stopped being sad about it because I realized that even if people don’t show up for you, it’s not because they don’t love you. It just means that you aren’t their priority right now. That’s not a judgment, that’s life. Things and people are more important at different times because no one has the bandwidth for it all.

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Without realizing it, I created a new Top 5. I created a new Top 10. Last year I wanted some help with my goals and accountability. I wanted people to talk to honestly, and I wanted to get new opinions. I created a group of women for that mutual support. It has been fantastic for all of us. That’s the kind of support I had been craving. I think they were, too.

I’m sure The Wallows will still prick me from time to time when I see people on social media hanging out together doing fun things without me, but I am reminding myself with this post and going forward that I have everything I need to be successful and happy. And I wish everyone else the best, too.

Welcome to Your Life

Okay, so it’s the first day of the year, so it’s obviously time to take a big old stab at doing things the way you want them done, right?

I’m looking at the next year and I’m really wanting to take action steps. I’ll start with this blog.

  • Blog more.
  • Have a more concrete voice on my blog.
  • Move the blog over to a new site.
  • Integrate it better with the rest of my social media life.
  • Have better ways to connect with new people.

Now let’s talk about my health and stuff.

  • Bust the plateau.
  • Get some serious weight loss results.
  • Get certified to be a personal trainer.
  • Get paid to teach PiYo.
  • Go to Summit like a #GirlBoss.

Personal life?

  • Spent more time with people.
  • Travel.
  • Have meaningful relationships.
  • Enjoy life.

Happy 2017.nye-2008-2016